My dentist is like a mechanic: she always finds something that needs fixing

For the first 29 year of my life, I had zero cavities (except a few in my baby teeth that fell out by the time I was eight years old).  Suddenly, when I hit 30 years of age, my dentist said that I needed four cleanings a year instead of the usual two, because my previously perfect teeth and gums were in need of some ongoing maintenance.  She also said I had a cavity “on its way” and that I should get it fixed pretty soon.  When I got that fixed, she said she’d monitor another tooth that was also “on its way”.  The next visit, I got it fixed.  Then I needed xrays.  Then, a night guard.  Then, an extra “scraping”.

Have you ever noticed that dentists are just like mechanics? 

They always manage to find something wrong with your mouth that needs fixing.  No matter how many times I brush in a day (I always brush twice) and how much I floss (which is every day) and use mouthwash (also daily), it seems that this dentist manages to find something that needs to be fixed. 

My dentist also talks to me when my mouth is full of her fingers, tools, and instruments.  She asks questions like, “Do think this rain will ever let up?”.  Lady, with all due respect, this is not the time for chit-chat!  First of all, hurry up and let me get out of there.  Second of all, how am I supposed to answer you with all of your tools in my mouth?

And another thing – don’t answer your cell phone when you’re the middle of your work.  My mouth was literally full of that crunchy toothpaste that they use to polish teeth, and she got a call on her cell – and answered it.  Seriously?  You don’t think I’m a just little uncomfortable, and that it might be just a little bit irritating having to lay there with my mouth open, full of crunchy toothpaste, while you chat with your husband about what you’re going to eat for dinner tonight? 

When it was all said and done, there was one final inspection.  Turns out, I have another small cavity that is “on its way”, and I will be going back in two weeks to fill it.  I think it might be time to find a new dentist.